Down the Poison, Don't Let It Out

Today was a very odd day. It just was, a lot of unexpecteds occurred, and my mind was all over the place. Yes, I definitely do like this person, if you're wondering, but really, ask me if you want to know. I won't be getting detailed here. I do have something to talk to you about though, Jess, so if you get the chance, like now since you're reading this blog, give me a holler please? I just need some advice. "Anywho," as my grandmother says, I'm pretty indifferent today. I took more picutres. I'm so excited for the Summer and next year, I really can't wait. 16, car, sophomores, oh the hated sophomores. Sophomore actually means "Wise fool." =] Hopefully by then many of the girls in our class would have MATURED some, yes? How about everyone, in general. Well, that's pretty funny, but it is a nice thought. Well I'm off to the shower in a few. I got a phone call. You know, today was all over the place. I had four separate people tell me that they liked me, wanted to throw eggs at someone and a minute later was absolutely fine (bi-polar), and I went from being on the most awesome volleyball team to being massacred by that beastly Taylor who plays volleyball. Alright, tell me here, WHO SCORED SIX POINTS OFF OF ONLY SERVES? She is pretty hot though, so I guess it's okay. Oh, you know you want to be like her. "...and the way she sets up Metzer, its like, 'Hey Ryan, iloveyou'." "No, actually it's more like, 'Hey, Ryan! LEARN HOW TO USE YOUR HANDS I GOT THIS POINT AHHHHHH!!!!" Yes, I talk to John, stop freaking out about it. I also saw him 6 times today. So, as I said, today's one of those days where music is the prevailing determining factor in my mood. Tomorrow probably will be too. But, again, who am I to make predictions? (Doesn't music throw my mood on EVERY day?) Off to watch Lost, shower, and maybe some Friday Night Lights. Who knows when I'll get to sleep?) Please comment, guys. I's what keeps me posting. You know, kinda like the crumbs on coffee cake. Makes me want MORE.

Like Eating Glass

Today was painfully slow. It's 9:42, so it's still not quite over. I just finished American Idol, and might I say that I'm not happy with ANY of the female contestants this season. Today all of them were pitchy or spazzy or a combo of the two. They're also VERY haughty. "I thought it was good, and that's all that matters." Simon was squirming in discontent, I know. Tomorrow we have gym yet again and I'm contesting whether or not to tell Chiara who I like for reasons that will soon show, just give them time. Jess suddenly left me on IM as she often does. Sigh...

And you didn't even notice When the sky turned blue And you couldn't tell the difference Between me and you And I nearly didn't notice The gentlest feeling

Well, today's to waste. Tomorrow is going to be an extremely warm 29 degrees! Wooh, break out the hot coals! Next week really is unseasonably warm, and I can't wait. I also can't wait until I go off to Puerto Rico to visit my family again in August. OH SO EXCITING. Needless today, I'm not the happiest camper. I hate going to sleep with a decision hanging over my head. DRARGH!! Meh!

You are the bluest light

-Who's doing that Rock Band competition? Night, =[

I want something good to die for...to make it beautiful to live.

Tonight? No more forecasting. Tomorrow's Monday. Tomorrow isn't just Monday. Tomorrow is Lab and a Math B Quiz. Welcome to Math B. Tomorrow isn't Monday. Tomorrow's Hellday. What does that make today? -Bad omen follow my shadow.

I can go with the flow

Tonight there are plenty of aromas in the air. Hints of just about anything...nice....like sugar and spice. (I had to.) While my PS3 is copying some movies from my computer, (FNL, Lost, The Office, to name a few) to watch on my TV, I guess I shall blog. I'm really in a good mood tonight. Things fell into place tonight, for the first time in two months. I'm happy with me. I love who I am. Sure, building more muscle, working out, I'm getting on that, but I love who I am, but above all I love my friends. I'm comfortable with all of them at the moment. I've talked to all of them, and they're all comfortable with me. I love it now. It's really amazing. On top of all of that, my mind is finally clear enough to know...hehe, this sounds stupid, but to definitely know who I like. (If you want details, ask me in private, or just comment.) Oh, that's the other thing. Thanks for the comments, guys. You're really supportive. No, really, thank you. No, seriously, gracias. Ah, damned thing is only at 38%. I really want to watch TV though! I wish it would hurry up. I'm buying rock band sometime this week, hopefully I can kick *** by Friday. Drums, dude, drums. I'm fine with guitar, so I hope. I realized today that there are many tough decisions in life. Now that I'm a new person, it's almost as if I have to re-think and experience it all over again. Sure, I'll always be the same person in the core, the one that Jess is far too good at figuring out...(meheh.) Well, I mean, hmm...this feeling tonight is ineffable. Ever felt so lighthearted (in a good way) and just excited, with butterflies in your stomach, even though you'll probably never have a chance? Yeah, that's me right now. High School's good, this is what it's supposed to feel like.

• I want something good to die for, to make it beautiful to live.

Goodnight, all of youz. =] =] =] =] =] =] =] =] C= =D [= [= [= [= [= [= [= [=

TV (or lack there of)

The poster of the BOR is all done. I just need to put the signatures/title up but I need a calligraphy pen for that. Here's your thought, people.

• Have you ever thought why the Bible teaches you to turn the other cheek?

Now I'm off to watch lost...or the Office...so much bad TV, I'm stuck watching Season 1 sets. -Maybe Friday Night Lights? Ce chiffre, c'est un deux. Le chat noir.

High School

Has anyone else realized that high school is just FLYING by, being about 5 weeks into the 3rd quarter ALREADY? I'm surely read for Summer, but if the rest of HS goes like this, I'll die in no time. ;]more later...

Nuts!

Jericho also needs your help, people. Bloggers, readers, any one from anywhere, join others and publicize Jericho. If you have Cable or Satellite, watch it yourself! You'll see how truly amazing it is. Even if CBS doesn't budge, TNT has expressed interest in the show.

Long, Lengthy Phone Conversation

And the thought for tonight -

• Sometimes you have to bite the bullet, but other times it's much better to dwell on how you can't get them off your skin, nor can you make them hang around...

I like that one. I made that with a little help from the song Go With The Flow by Queens of the Stone Age. I was on the phone with Cate for like an hour just now. I need to play catch up with her, so I might stop by her house tomorrow. Goodnight people!

Mother Nature at her Best

Thats my personal picture as a photographer. Man, if only I could nail that every time. Isn't that amazing?

Everything, Everything'll Be Just Fine

A day I do NOT want snow is Friday night. Lord, AHH. And today was reallllyyyy interesting. I'm just. AAHFOIEAGERB. ASIOJFKSALMFDBAS. FDHGIABD. DVEFLBAJWEORLMBERLAHMAJAW. ASIOKAJBMNAS

• It's only in your head that you feel left out and looked down on, babe.

It Just Takes Some Time-

I'm ecstatic today. Yes, I have plenty to do in school, and an NHD scroll to write. Jess should bring the calligraphy today, so it's cool. Oh some loud bang outside, FUN! It's like 19 degrees and I rwally don't want to go out. Okay time to hit the bus BYE! =]

All Time High

This is the best mood I've been in for two and a half months, so let me be, let me be elated, let me be on this natural high. Oh my God, thank the good Lord, I'm so freaking happy.

• Sometimes we live for no one but ourselves

lhmp I love life at the moment.

Amen.

It's mornin', about 6:19. I woke up really early, and slept maybe a minuscule three hours. I simply couldn't sleep last night. I'm not sure why. Oh boy, I still have this NHD scroll to finish up. I left the calligraphy pens at Jess's house, to top it off. I guess I'll just sketch it all out in pencil. I have a heck of a day planned, and I mean all planned out, to the very last detail, and none of it involves drama. I said my prayers, and I'll pray them again. No more drama. I want to be me. Lord, hear my prayer.

Oh boy

Massive head ache, moving troubles, STUPID DRAMA. WHY CAN'T I BE A JUNIOR OR SENIOR!? With all my friends, of course. The non dramatic ones. That'd be nice. My head it literally everywhere. I'm so stressed out, I can't think straight, and tomorrow is a MATH QUIZ? OH MY GOD GOOD LUCK.

To A Certain Someone

What are you supposed to do when they tell you, "My friends think you bring out the bad in me." How are you supposed to feel? Is it numb? Is it despair? Is it none of those? Because my heart's all over the world tonight. You told me that, and it hurt. I was thrown. It's not your fault. I guess it's no one's, really, but this is just to get it out there. To anyone that reads this, and might feel that way, I'm sorry, but there's nothing you nor I can do about it. Just know, when I heard it, I was quite heartbroken and thrown. Where do I go from here?

In A World...

• ...where every he has a she
• ...where every she has a he
• ...that's full of dfb's

-I have an issue with liking taken people. And it's not like I usually like those taken. So many of my friends are taken, I'm often left with no choice. sighh...

Oh boy oh boy.

Thought of the day coming courtesy of a very special red head.

• People are stupid and the world should die

As for my day today? Interesting.

Exciting Times A Comin'? No.

Same old crap, as a matter of fact. Well, not really...hmmmm hehehe. Well anyway, as for today's thought -

• P.S. I Love You

No more bad words!

-This sums up my night with two iPods and a messy computer so far.

Where Everything's Meant To Be Broken, I Just Want You To Know Who I Am.

This is it. For me, and for only myself, I'm changing my life. Anything goes, but this incessant drama and pain just won't go away, especially the latter half, and this time I'm making a decision for me, and I'm not going to deal with it anymore. Hate me if you wish, hate this post, hate it all, I'm terribly sorry if it hurts, but if I'm not happy, I can't possibly make others happy. Of course I'll always keep those that are really great to me, and really close to my heart, but people, I'm done trying, reaching out, only to get hurt again. I don't care what people think from here on out. I'll always be there to help and listen, but when I can't get through to you, when I can't be treated like a real friend, or at least the friend you describe me to be, it hurts. I'm done with the pain, and I'm done with the false life I'm tired of living. No more faked smiles. Come Tuesday, (Sunday night, for some of yous,) you'll see the blunt and real me. For most of you, you won't see a change. But few will, and if they don't like it, please, by all means, get out of my path. Let me know first, I don't want to turn into a jerk, you know. But don't come to me, telling me you've changed, telling me you listen, telling me you get it. That's nice. Actions speak louder than words, baby. We're all guilty of the same things, but sameness doesn't exist in this world, if I know correctly. I'm going my route, I'm telling you who I am, I'm telling you how I feel, I'm telling you what you're doing, and you've told me what I'm doing. I'm actually fixing them. (With the exception of this blog post, which I'm sorry for.) Now I'm off to ask Chiara what her dress looks like and to enjoy my night, without the drama. Au revoir. ---to your heart.

Big News!

Well, just thought I might let you people know that there is a pretty good chance, and I mean it this time, that I will be moving within the coming months. You see, there's a home for sale on Division St., right off of West Street, about 6 blocks from town, and halfway towards the school, so it's in the middle of everything. The inside of the house is completely brand new, and gutted clean. It's not the largest house, but nonetheless it is very nice. Chores are going to open up, such as shoveling, but I'd actually like to do things like that. I mean, yeah, I'll get sick of them, but so be it. Moving into a house would be a welcome change. It would also mean my step brother moving in with us, which would mean we'd have to make a guest room for MEGHAN. Oh boy. She'll be at my house everyday. Well, plans are actually moving steadily along, as my mom's friend Zeenata (best name ever, I call her Zee for short,) is a real estate agent. We'll be going to her house tomorrow for advice and things the like. Other than that, I'm struggling with two very moody iPod Touches and I'm a bit under the weather myself, in part to Meghan's stupid cough. I hate you Meg. I'm bored to tears and Michelle & Meg woke me up this morning...calling my cell phone...I could kill you guys. ☺ For today's thought -

• Trees are the poems nature writes upon the sky.

STUPID NULLRIVER I AM GOING TO KILL THESE PEOPLE.

Pitchers & Catchers...

Pitchers and Catchers officially report to spring training tomorrow at 6:00AM sharp. I'm SOOOOOO excited!!!!! WOOOOHHH!!! Check out Michelle's blog if you get the chance.

As NaBloPoMo Says...

Just as NaBloPoMo says, I'm to Blog every day for a month. Officially, I don't have to until March, where I'm to make a list of some sort every day for 31 days. For February? I guess I'll write a thought per day, if I can.

• Anybody ever thought how a natural high may make you smile for a bit, but depression can take your life away?

Okay, not the most thrilling topic, but deal. I'll be around. I'm not feeling so well. Grr, I still have Meghan's stupid cough, Meghan, if you read this, I hate you. ☺

Nondenominational HELL.

Well, anyway, I am just giving another shout out to foreigners, please comment! Even if it's anonymously, please comment, I'd like to hear frmo you guys. I got visitors from 8 countries yesterday, with 50 visits! PLEASE COMMENT, PLEASE!

The Day Is Here

Today is the day. And, you know what? I'm going to be completely honest. It has me quite edgy, very edgy, in fact, and in large part to how someone has been handling it, and still doesn't see it. I'm not going to go back and explain, it's water under the bridge and wasted breath, anyway. So you get it, I'm not in the best of moods at the moment, and I don't want to hear about it, so please don't tell. My crappy mood can be summed up in one word, but thats rude, isn't it? Otherwise, besides that, I'm actually in a really good mood today, A lot of nicer things are going on in my life recently, and while I do think them too private to blog about, I just might tell if you ask. Then again, maybe I won't, so don't take it personally. I was invited to go to Fratellos tonight, but shockingly I declined. My life is perfectly summed up by about three songs, sometimes four, but the fourth is rather random, but I'm rather random. Alright, they are One, by Metallica, (in the song list up there) Bleed it Out by Linkin' Park, and Ballroom Blitz, not sure who it's by. The fourth? Move Your Feet by Junior Senior, which is up there, as well. Well, those interesting and fun things going on in my life keep me moving, but...past that? Today's crap. Chiara's my Valentine, but past that, just, ARGHH. FREAKING EGGS!

VDAY, Editing

Beforeeee Afterrr Like, Cristina? Hahahahahahahahahh!!!

Bullet Mp3's

Okay, this is amazing...

Next time you're reaching down for that iPod or Zune (or anything else for that matter), take care that you don't alarm the authorities with any suspicious movements -- or you could end up like the UK's Darren Nixon. Apparently, the mild-mannered mechanic was on his way home from work when the Bobbies surrounded him and drew their guns, believing that the MP3 player in his pocket was a firearm. According to the Daily Mail, Mr. Nixon was tracked on CCTV, arrested at gunpoint, swabbed for DNA, fingerprinted, and thrown in a cell -- all for listening to a bootleg of Chinese Democracy on a 4GB Philips GoGear. Said Darren, "I was really shocked when I saw the guns. They were pointing them right at me. It was a pretty scary experience. I had no idea what was going on." After the team of Mentat cops realized their mistake, they couldn't even offer an apology, said Nixon, "They just dropped me off at home and said a quick 'sorry for any inconvenience', and that was all I got from them, which I thought was pretty out of order." Once again, a hot serving of sweet justice.

[Via CrunchGear] I wonder what the MP3 Player looked like...

Un-Valentine's Day

Tomorrow's the day. Oh boy, oh joy. Well, I guess she'll be happy. That's all that counts, really. -COMMENT MY BLOG, PLEASE!!! I LOVE COMMENTS FROM PEOPLE I DON'T KNOW, SO PLEASE, COMMENT, IT'D BE LOVELY.

...

yessssss

Don't Stop the Beat

Well, I use this wiggy-diggy that tells me a bunch of information (locational, and technical) about the people that visit my blog. (No need to call the Patriot Act Police. It's strictly nothing personal.) Anyway, I see that I have "Regulars" that visit my blog from the bustling cities of Canberra and Sydney in Australia. Hey, "Regulars?" It'd be nice if you dropped a comment once in a while. I, for one, LOVE Australia, it's really my dream place to live. iTunes says this song is pretty popular at the moment in Australia, can you tell me, is it?

melessthanfriendslessthanAustralia and Australians. 

I<3aussies.

If I met a cute Australian girl, omg.

One of These Things Just Doesn't Belong Here!

Today was very interesting, wasn't it, Kerianne?

Moving on- 

It's night time, I'm tired, not depressed, I have better things to do. Yell at me all you want but I am NOT doing NHD next year. I'm taking 3 languages, AND photography, AND a job. Forget it.

Yell at me for this, too, if you'd like, but thank GOD they finally kissed. Huh?

Eggs

-haha cristina. "Who's the better kisser?" LMAO.

And kerianne....what to say to you, damn, everything.

Comments - NOTE TO FOREIGNERS.

You guys, come on!!! I miss your comments....even if it means someone from Baton Rouge, Kalamazoo, MI, Canberra, London, Quebec, Beijing, Baghdad, or Rio de Janiero is commenting, can someone please shout one out to me? If you're from another country, it's a plus. Feel free to just ramble on about how it is there, really, I welcome all of your comments. Hallo, Ola, Hola, Guten Tag, Ni Hao, Arigato, Bonjour. (And even bunga wunga, too. Comment in your own language, if you wish.)

An Issue Worthy of Scorn

Something has to be addressed, because, frankly, it's wrong. -You do not, under any circumstances judge one by his/her blog & blog posts. It's highly immature, and you'll get an entirely incorrect perspective and alotted measurement of ideals about the person from their blog posts. Often blogs are a place of ramblage, a place of unwind. So, do us all a favor, and stop judging based on posts. There's more to a person than a blog spit out to a CPU in binary, if you get what I mean, okay? That's how it's fake, so grow up. Huzza.

Yes. We. Can.

Watch that. It's not stupid, and its only 4:30. It's really worth your while. I mean it. It was a creed written into the founding documents that declared the destiny of a nation. Yes we can. It was whispered by slaves and abolitionists as they blazed a trail toward freedom. Yes we can. It was sung by immigrants as they struck out from distant shores and pioneers who pushed westward against an unforgiving wilderness. Yes we can. It was the call of workers who organized; women who reached for the ballots; a President who chose the moon as our new frontier; and a King who took us to the mountaintop and pointed the way to the Promised Land. Yes we can to justice and equality. Yes we can to opportunity and prosperity. Yes we can heal this nation. Yes we can repair this world. Yes we can. We know the battle ahead will be long, but always remember that no matter what obstacles stand in our way, nothing can stand in the way of the power of millions of voices calling for change. We have been told we cannot do this by a chorus of cynics...they will only grow louder and more dissonant ........... We've been asked to pause for a reality check. We've been warned against offering the people of this nation false hope. But in the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything false about hope. Now the hopes of the little girl who goes to a crumbling school in Dillon are the same as the dreams of the boy who learns on the streets of LA; we will remember that there is something happening in America; that we are not as divided as our politics suggests; that we are one people; we are one nation; and together, we will begin the next great chapter in the American story with three words that will ring from coast to coast; from sea to shining sea -- Yes. We. Can. Celebrities featured include: Jesse Dylan, Will.i.am, Common, Scarlett Johansson, Tatyana Ali, John Legend, Herbie Hancock, Kate Walsh, Kareem Abdul Jabbar, Adam Rodriquez, Kelly Hu, Adam Rodriquez, Amber Valetta, Eric Balfour, Aisha Tyler, Nicole Scherzinger and Nick Cannon

COLLAGE!

THEN I made a COLLEGE out of my photos. Likey?

After. If you realize, not all of it is black and white, and the white is really strong. Comment, please? Let me know how I am, I'd like to know.

Editing number THREE

No, THIS is before. The previous was after. Sorry people, it's late, I'm tired.

Editing number TWO

before...

Editing number ONE

Before... You know how I say I edit pictures?

Up, Down, Left, Right, Round n' Round

Today was bittersweet. It began horribly, the day went pretty well, went horribly again and ended.......oddly. You know what? I was in such a good mood when I started writing. Lorddyy. -Five more days, I can't #*%&^)@ wait.

Editing Spunk

-Looks like Meg had a rough night... C=

In with a boom.

Well, February is here, and I had an awesome day today, in some high-end mall in Westchester that had $1000 chocolates, with edible diamonds. Go figure, people.

• December - half hell.
• January - hell
• February - will be hell.

Just get it over with already, I mean, I guess it's none of my business but it's really not fair to me. -Can't I be a Valentine's Day sweethe♥rt? Ladies, I'm not such a bad guy. ;-) Well, I guess that's to one person, not the entire populous. Well, you never know, maybe two. HAHAHA 0=]. Oh, I have an idea. A nice editing thing I can do. Hmm, I feel like the real experimental photographer tonight. -Near it lays a sign that says, "No, touch guy - you can't bend it. It can calculate pi faster than you and your grandma." The other one says "The worlds thinnest laptop - literally." (I lifted it entirely off the ground with one pinky. It's really that light.

REVAMP.

Okay, so my blog is going to change, A LOT, within the next week or so, whenever I get the chance to finally change that code and stuff. Stupid stuff. But it must be done. Three hints to what it'll look like: 1) Pull 2) Flashy 3) My Song --- DOWN THERE!!! She's not my girlfriend, but I guess I fell in love with our friendship. -Why do we kill people who kill people to show people that killing people is wrong?